“Can I tell you about something exciting happening in my life?”
This was the question posed to me by my husband a few weeks ago as we were doing the bathroom shuffle. I turned to look at him – trying to appear enthused, but mostly cautious. J and I are pretty tight; we share nearly everything that is going on. So what exciting thing did I miss? And in that moment I knew: must be hunting, fishing, or soccer related. So I braced myself…and let him speak.
“I’ve been watching Craigslist for duck blinds…” A smile cracked across my face. Of course. Hunting. And we are now the proud owners of two used duck blinds. J really wanted one, but with two available? Well, now lil O (our nearly two-year-old) has his own too – at least ready for him in a few years.
My husband loves to hunt. LOVES it. And it doesn’t matter what critter is at risk. I remember asking him one weekend what he was going to kill (when I wasn’t sure what hunting season it was), and he said, “I don’t know. Probably a coyote. Or something.” LOL – this man just wants to be outside and get after it! (And God rest the souls of any coyotes, squirrels, or birds that cross his path.)
But this hobby can be very time consuming. We both work full time, so J wants to spend many a weekend in the great outdoors. And lil O and I are on our own. Which can suck. And be lonely. But I’m the wife of a hunter. So it just comes with the territory.
At first, I felt very upset when he’d leave for a whole 48 hours. (Two whole days. I know. The struggle.) It was really tough to deal with the first couple years. Then he said something about how thankful he was for that time and how much it rejuvenated him. Well, crap. I guess I have to let him go with a comment like that. But in turn, I explained how I felt a bit abandoned, which led to him making some meals before he left so I wouldn’t feel the entire weight on my shoulders (of caring for a fairly independent two-year-old. My life is clearly so hard). So now, while I’m not totally ok with him being gone for an entire weekend, I handle it a bit better because we’ve worked out needs for both of us. I’ve gotten less angry over time. And he knows he needs to be back for Sunday night dinner so we can have some family time before another week begins. The compromise helps!
I love that my husband has something to get excited about. And I can sacrifice some family time for him to take some rest time doing a hobby he loves. His rejuvenation leads to him being better engaged in family time, which is something exciting happening in my life.